Sunday, December 26, 2010

I just need to warn you all right now...


My oldest son, Mike, will be 18 at the end of February. At the end of this school year, he will be graduating (at least I hope he will be).

This means that he will sort of be an adult. He can vote. He can live on his own... maybe.

I'm pretty convinced that he will die pretty quickly when living on his own. You see, he has had the ability to read since he was in kindergarten. However, when it comes to reading directions, he somehow loses this ability. Like, for cooking, for example. "Mom, how do you make this?" "Read the directions." "Mom, how long should this go in the microwave for?" "Read the directions."

He's going to leave my house and live on cereal on hot pockets and become host to a family of tapeworms I think. Then he'll go to the doctor, get some prescription, but still end up dying because he won't read the prescription directions.

I am a failure.

5 comments:

Sans Pantaloons said...

Buy Mike a wok as a graduation present. He can then stir fry his hot pockets.

Dale said...

It's wrong but I'm laughing and laughing. Hot pockets indeed. Happy New Year!

Kate said...

I found you from Sans Pantaloons. I love your site. I’m going to poke around a little bit, but don’t worry I’ll put everything back where I found it!!

Flannery Alden said...

I just stopped by and noticed the blog card list on the left and I got curious. Here is the post where Barbara from Bad Tempered Zombie received it. I don't think anyone has claimed it from her, so you might be able to get it back.

Flannery Alden said...

Nictionary got the card! But the blog is defunct and the Flickr account is out of date. Am stalking him on Twitter. I'll see if I can't find out what happened to it.

The Card's Last Known Photo